RULES OF ENGAGEMENT

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It seems like this bug is going round and is here to stay. Everyone everywhere is getting engaged like the plague. I realized while I enjoy listening to engagement stories I have a few ground rules:

Dear Future Husband,

  1. NEVER EVER PROPOSE TO ME IN PUBLIC!

Never! I will just walk out on you and you will look dumb kneeling in front of everyone else. It might seem like a good idea to ask me in front of my friends or family or at a restaurant with strangers or on live TV. Don’t! I am yet to see a woman who was composed during her proposal. I need to be able to scream incoherently in my mother tongue and kiss you passionately without making an aunt blush. I might just panic and say no because i am easily embarrassed when I am the centre of attention like this. Private does not mean no photographers by all means…I am sure my audience would love to see photos. Who knows we might even break the internet.

2. ASK FOR MY HAND

Take the cue of when to propose from me. If we have gone on two dates and you ask me to marry you, I will probably look at you and check you into a mental facility. Family is everything to me, I need to know you can play with my nephew all day without complaining and have a conversation with my mum without hurrying her. You should have no trouble taking up my cousins on a good debate. Basically if you have not been around my family then you have no business buying a ring.

It is only respectful that you arrange to meet my dad privately and ask for his blessing beforehand. Then you can go mad scientist with your proposal plan.

3. I DARE YOU TO SURPRISE ME

There is yet to be a surprise party thrown for me that I did not see coming for miles. I find out and act surprised (sorry Hooligans!) I am going to blame my BFF Cathy, she cannot hide anything from me for long. So if you intend on surprising me I suggest you not tell her or Wanja. Tough luck though because she is the only one who knows the ring I would love.

4.  I HAVE EXCELLENT MEMORY

Plan your speech, cram it, repeat it to yourself every night in front of the mirror for a month. I have excellent memory and I often remember such trivialties. Then when you get down on one knee (this is not optional) forget what you wrote and let your heart speak to mine. Cry if you have to because I will probably be screaming like a mad woman. This won’t matter because we will be in private and we are both allowed to be dumb.

Husband, if you dare embarrass me with a public proposal I will definitely take my revenge at a time when you least expect that is a promise. If you do not go down on one knee, I’m not sure if I can say YES. If you manage to surprise me, I better be dressed up for it. Either way as long as you promise me your whole heart, I promise to take care of it.

Sincerely,

Grace!

You know the drill, leave a comment below let me know how you plan to propose or don’t want to happen when you are finally being proposed to. Also follow me on all my social media @PiscesTwentyTwo on Twitter, @Pisces_TwentyTwo on Instagram and Pisces22 on Facebook

  • Trisha Lur

    I shared your blog with my work colleges and they loved it. So did I…awesome

    • http://pisces22.com Grace Ndiege

      Thank you so much for the support! I cannot be more grateful

  • Abel Muhatia

    OOOOOOOOh my goodness… nonetheless not too hard to handle…kwani iko nini

    • http://pisces22.com Grace Ndiege

      Hahaha iko nini lakini! See what I did there

  • Felista Esolio

    Day made. I wonder how you’d pull off screaming incoherently in your mother tongue though.

    • http://pisces22.com grace alice Ndiege

      Propose to me and you will find out! hahaha

  • Job Kiruhi

    lets call it the procedure of proposing to you. But things like planning your speech, bending on one knee and crying are not my cup of coffee.

    • http://pisces22.com grace alice Ndiege

      Hahaha I like men like you, you will cry at every moment. When she says yes, when she’s walking down the aisle, when you have your first child hahaha please keep me updated.

  • http://pisces22.com grace alice Ndiege

    Ha! Please by all means if you know your girl and she doesn’t mind. Me I’m not a fan